Thursday, February 26, 2015


I just got the email from CaroLily. That is the word they used to call themselves in the email. Caroline & Lily are two important AFS-USA Sponsored Program Coordinator that always send a remainder to fill out the Exchange Student Survey so i could get the stypends money each month.

They also included the words we used to describe our experience so far! They picked a word that people submit last month! Mine is Adventurous.

It's an adventurous journey.I saw a lot of new things. When I just got here, I kinda feel like I was an Alien. William, Jasleen's 5 years old host-brother even agreed with it by mispronouncing my name as Alien, not Ellen -_-

It has been a busy week, I need a refreshing. Spending time with friends probably.

Wednesday, February 25, 2015

The Warm Kind of Coldness

After school, I went home and took my camera. I was thinking to get a Peppermint hot chocolate at Starbucks in The Mall at Columbia. Peppermint makes me feel better somehow. Yeah I want to starbucks for the Peppermint Hot Chocolate and the view. You could call me basic, but seriously Peppermint is the best.

I waited the bus near the Food Lion. I stood there for 15 minutes, it was -2° C. I couldn't wait any longer. I decided to walk to the mall because no bus came. I don't need to tell you what is going on at the Mall, it's a regular mall day. The peppermint hot chocolate and the pictures that I took today highlight my day anyway. 

The sun was about to say good bye. I went to the bus stop and stood beside the old man that were smoking cigarette, It feels home. If I knew that person well, i wanted to take the cigarette and smoked it. I miss Jakarta and its lifestyle, really..

I asked him which bus was going to the west. The old man was confused. But he told me anyway, i took a bus and ended up at the bus stop around Laurel. I was catching up the sunset. The view was beautiful and ciamique. 

I realized I need to go back home. So i took the brown bus to go to Oakland Mills Village Center. I sat in a seat next to the window on the bus today. After the bus moved, I saw the bus stop get smaller and smaller until I couldn't see that anymore. It was an orange sky with white clouds. The white snow reflects the sunset. 

Time flew so fast...

All i could think was how peaceful it was, how beautiful it was, how comfortable it was, how grateful i was to be here and looked at the sky. If it were possible to jump out of the bus, I couldn't imagine how fresh the air out there. It might be the warm kind of coldness.

The bike path behind my house.

I am grateful for the time I had here.
For the smile from the strangers that they gave to me,
For the cigarrete burning sounds that I heard today,
For the bus driver that letting me have a peaceful moment in a bus,
For the old man that tell me how to go West,
For the people that said they were okay,
For God that letting me to see the sky.

Dear friends

Dear friends

It has been 6 months and 14 days since i left.
Nothing is the same.
But I'm glad that i'm here. I finally publish a blog post since I arrived here. I always write a journal though. So that I could read it someday.

USA is wonderful. I met a lot of wonderful people that has beautiful personalities. I am doing okay here. Thou' this past month have been the hardest moment of my exchange year here. Nothing is wrong, I am okay because I have nice friends and a lovely second family that cheered me up. So, Don't you worry about me. 

To be honest, I am afraid of losing you, I am afraid of losing my self. I am afraid if i will not be who i am today, tomorrow , 2 days from now, next month, the next 2 months, and the day when I am coming back. 

I am afraid of losing people, here. I built my life there for 16 years and leave it for a year. I'm gonna get it back soon.

But, i'm building my life here for a year and i'm gonna leave it forever. 

Which one do you think is harder? 

I don't want to go back right now. But I want to see you soon.
Don't you worry...
We still see the same sky anyway...

I am doing okay.